As I sit here on March 19th, 2019, our nation (and the entire planet) is suffering from the fallout the coronavirus pandemic has caused – and continues to cause. The worst is still over the horizon according to the experts. It seems (almost) illogical for an unseen foe to wield as much power as this virus does. I have developed a healthy respect (pun intended) for it – but I do not fear it. My concern is the possibility of being a type of Typhoid Mary – spreading the virus and infecting those I love – without knowing it – even though I have no reason to believe I have been exposed to it. I suppose pre-infection guilt > my own personal fear. This brings me to the reason for this post – family and its importance.
https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-frightening-legacy-of-typhoid-mary-180954324/
First – an apology from my generation (generation x) to my children’s generation (millennial): we have failed you as parents – at least for not teaching how important family is in life. The day after the shooting in Columbine I wrote this:
Angry Young Men
Killing each other in places of learning
Angry young men with their souls lost and yearning
Seeking true meaning and hoping to find
Answers to questions they have in their mind.
We search for the answer, the meaning, the cause
We can’t solve this problem by passing more laws
Parents decide when this madness will end
Only family can stop these angry young men.
Each soul is unique, each person his own
Prop open the door and hate has no home
Where trust can abide, good seed can be sown
With guidance the path will always been known.
We must be good parents and role models too
And help our kids learn what is honest and true
Spend time with them, hear their wants and desire
Catch hate soon enough, you can put out its fire.
Teach tolerance for those who are different in ways
When love is sown, love always repays
It must not go unsaid, I repeat it again
Only family can stop these angry young men.
Growing up here in rural Northeast Georgia, I was blessed to have two wonderful extended families – people who truly love me because of the blood coursing through my veins, regardless of what I “offered” them in return. I was loved (still am) by people who want(ed) the best for me, and were always there when I need(ed) them. Perhaps it is because I am from farming family stock – families who pulled together and worked for the greater good of the family (“The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few” to quote Spock). Or perhaps it was due to the time period I grew up in? I do know this: God was the only thing more important to my 4 grandparents than their extended families. Honestly, I was spoiled and showered with much more love than most people receive in a lifetime; but I took it for granted (unfortunately) until the solid rocks that are my grandparents disappeared. But I kept their foundation – in my mind and in my soul. Unfortunately I am not as good of a builder/rebuilder as they were, and over time my bond with family still alive has weakened. For what it’s worth, Mexican culture elevates family to the level we used to have here in the South – they even maintain their mother’s maiden name inside their own name – this is why so many have hyphens like Garcia-Ramirez. I love that aspect of their culture – but the E in my name stands for Edward, not Elrod. If my Pop’s name wasn’t Edward, I’d consider changing it into Elrod.
You may be wondering what this has to do with the coronavirus? Everything to be honest with you. The safety net, provided by my family, is no longer there for millennials – my children’s generation. One role of the family is to nurture and nurse ailing members back to health… Yet baby boomers are increasingly alone – and living far away from what family structure they have/had – in nursing homes or assisted care living facilities. My generation is too busy and self important (and greedy) to keep seniors in their own homes instead of nursing homes. We are failing our parents AND our kids. I wish I could go back and revisit conversations I had with both of my grandfathers about hard times and how to conquer life – their wisdom is light years ahead of what I will ever have. Ironically (or perhaps not) they both told me that in my lifetime I would live through something akin to the Great Depression and WWII. In fact, that it would probably be worse than the Depression because our current society is not tied to the land and couldn’t grow their own food. Like a silly immature kid, I didn’t listen nearly as closely as I should have. Pooling resources, bartering, being alone/isolated, rationing (see toilet paper) etc. are foreign concepts in our crazy, fast pace 24/7/365 world. Will our selfishness and greed overrule our empathy/concern for other people? It is too early to say just yet, but it don’t look good for the home team right now.
To close out this rambling incoherent stream of consciousness, I ask you to consider a couple of things. First, is there a family member in your smartphone that you KNOW would be there for you when the chips are down? If so, call them and talk out mutual concerns/worries/thoughts on the coronavirus, and make damn sure they know you love them and will be there to help shoulder the burden if need be. Sometimes the act of confiding in another person and being able to get things off your chest is as helpful as almost any medication. Peace of mind is just as important as daily exercise. If you DON’T have that type of relationship in your life, find someone in your family and grow your relationship into a vital, living and growing entity. Oh —– and don’t forget to wash your hands AND use hand sanitizer as often as you can. See you after my self imposed banishment/exile is over, I can escape my cage, and this damn virus 🦠 is history, herstory, and theirstory. I already need a hug.
P.s. If you happen to be reading this, please know I am here 24/7/365, and will try to help in any way possible (should someone need my excuse for “help”). 🤣
P.p.s. I hope and pray no one reading this “fails a coronavirus” test – neither the actual health test nor the family test.